Women & The Cloak of Invisibility
Let me ask you - Do Princess Diaries and Becoming by Michelle Obama has anything in common? Other than the fact that both ladies held the most important positions in their countries, there aren’t many parallels to draw. Yet there were instances in both films(yes, I am talking about movies here) where invisibility was mentioned. Michelle Obama was asked whether she ever felt invisible. Her answer was a clear cut no. She answered in detail that her parents always made her seen. "To be seen"- that is the ultimate dream! Now let’s come back to Princess Mia. People barely notices her and there was a scene where one guy tried to sit on her because he didn’t see her. It cannot be worse than that, right? Then there is this scene where she learns that she is a Princess and in shock she replies to her grandmother that "My expectation in life is to be invisible. And I am quite good at that". Oh Mia, my heart goes out to you at that moment.
Honestly, I believe that only one percent of the women have parents like Michelle Obama. The rest of us grow up not being seen, trying not to draw too much attention to us lest we will be the ones who will be blamed, feeling inadequate and crippled with fear in every second of our lives. One of the constant reminder that gets echoed every now and then in our lives is we are not enough. And unlike Princess Mia, our lives do not have a fairy tale ending also where we end up being a princess. A few of us realise that this is not the way to live, we try to carve our own paths, search through the dark alleys without much guidance and persevere even though each day is a new battle with our inner demons. The rest of us surrender and follow the already laid out path without ever knowing that there is another way. They become the invisible women!
It is so hard to be seen. Each time when my argument gets cut off in the middle by a male colleague, my first instinct is to be quiet and give up. Some days all I want to do is to crawl back into my mother’s womb and never be born into this world. Oddly some days I sleep exactly like that. It gives me a secure feeling in a world that is so unwelcoming to me. I am not sure there will be a day in my life when I feel "seen" and be comfortable with that. But till then, I will try to get out of my invisibility cloak once in a while and may be one day, unknowingly I will be comfortable in my own skin.
